Confronting Depression, Unleashing Hope

It has officially been 7 months since the titlewave that is the COVID-19 pandemic hit the shores of the US. While the dust has settled and the shock worn off, there are still major implications of the pandemic that are being discovered daily. The ripple effects of this pandemic continue to affect lives, including canceled events, job losses, and financial troubles, to name a few. While some losses may have occurred pre-COVID, the quarantine left many people with open schedules and little to do besides stare their issues straight in the face.

Most of my clients are currently in counseling for reasons either directly or indirectly related to the pandemic.

The CDC released a study just last month that showed 40% of adults have seen a decrease in their mental health because of the pandemic, with 30% experiencing anxiety and/or depression specifically. With that in mind, it is important for us to take a step back and acknowledge the various ways in which COVID-19 may be increasing depression. We will begin by looking closely at the definition and severity of depression, followed by tools that can be incorporated in order to find hope in the face of depression.

While many believe depression to be intense feelings of sadness, there is actually a greater depth to the reality that is depression. Overall, depression causes feelings of numbness, emptiness, and hopelessness that make everyday tasks extremely difficult. The Diagnostic Statistical Manual describes depression by a list of symptoms, including decreased interest in things you used to enjoy, decreased or increased appetite, lack of energy, difficulty sleeping or oversleeping, feelings of worthlessness or guilt, trouble concentrating, suicidal ideation and questioning whether life is even worth living.

While these are the behavioral symptoms of depression, there are several emotional aspects that are important to mention.

Chip Dodd’s Voice of the Heart defines anger as a passion or energy for things we really care about in life. According to Dodd, depression arises when we depress anger for things we are passionate about.

Having things we care about in life takes energy, and depression competes for the same energy in our hearts. Therefore, the one we allow to have space and breath will be the one that wins. As humans, we have a voice that wants to be heard, but there are risks involved with sharing our voice with others.

We inevitably will experience hurt and rejection by other people when we voice what we care about, and therein lies the hope. When we allow ourselves to take the risk and push through the vulnerability, we will experience life more fully. Depression uses shame to push down our desires and longings in order to protect us from experiencing hurt. However, this leads to numbness and isolation as we disconnect from ourselves, God, and others.

Depression can range from day to day hopelessness to a clinically diagnosable disorder.

One way I have heard the severity of depression described is with the analogy a clipboard. When you are in the driver’s seat of a car and you are holding a clipboard in front of your face, your ability to see, move the steering wheel, and fully operate the car is severely impaired.

Next, you may have the clipboard sitting in your lap, but your hands are still holding it. While your eyes are free to see what is in front of you, it is still difficult to function well in the driver’s seat.

Finally, you are able to move your hands away from the clipboard and operate the car to its full capacity. While the clipboard is still there sitting in your lap, it is not impairing your ability to drive as severely as before. The clipboard in this example represents the extent to which depression can impede our normal life functioning.

Having this range of severity in mind can help us discern to what extent we need help navigating the car trips of life. Personally, I have dealt with a low level of depression for a really long time. It moves from my lap with my hands free, to maybe somewhere in my line of vision depending on the season of life I am in.

I have experienced so much hope in counseling by learning where I have been suppressing my voice in the past and making sure I am leaving room for my voice to be valued by myself and others. No matter where you fall within the range of severity, there is hope for healing and relief from the emptiness you may be experiencing. 

At our core, we are created with specific feelings, needs, longings, desires, and hope. Throughout our lives, we share these things with others and at some point experience rejection along the way.

This experience may lead us to recoil and hide our true selves so that we are protected from future rejection. Part of healing from depression is discovering the parts of ourselves that we have been hiding and protecting for so long. Giving voice and breath to the things we deeply care about allows us to actually feel life and live it more fully.

Chip Dodd defines hope as our “heart’s passion for life”. We can express hope when we reach out to others and allow them to meet us where we are. Also, acknowledging our feelings and taking those to people to ask for what we need is a vital step.

Disclaimer: this must be accomplished with safe people. Finding individuals in our life who we can trust with ourselves is an important step in this process. More on that later.

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In addition, there are some practical steps that can be used to combat depression and foster hope. Research shows that exercise is a great tool that can be used to decrease symptoms of depression. This doesn’t mean you have to go out and become a professional runner, but taking a walk around the block is a way better option than continuing to sit on the couch. Moving your body in general is beneficial and can promote healthy habits that foster energy and hope. This can include stretching and deep breathing as well.

Next, a gratitude journal is a way to acknowledge the things in our life that we are thankful for. This activity is not meant to further shame you in your depression, which says “look at all the great things in your life, you shouldn’t be depressed.” Instead, taking away our attention from the negative things in our life that we have no control over and intentionally bringing to mind the positive things can have a major impact on our overall mood.

Sleep is another important aspect that must be regulated in ways that improve mood and normal life functioning.

Scheduling activities with friends and family can also combat feelings of numbness and hopelessness that are connected to depression. When someone is depressed, they are probably not going to feel like partaking in these activities, especially if there is an overall decreased interest in the things they once enjoyed. However, putting plans on our calendar and being diligent to say “yes” when that reminder pops up will create small changes that can snowball into bigger shifts that improve our overall mood. 

While these are all important activities we can incorporate into our daily routine, we cannot achieve these tasks alone. When I realize my car is out of gas, I can easily take it to the gas station to fill up. However, if I have a flat tire, then I may need to call a friend for help. Furthermore, when there are bigger issues with my car, I will need to call an expert mechanic who is trained in fixing these issues.

This example points to the different levels of help that we need in times of depression. For instance, there are things I am capable of achieving on my own, but there are many things that I need accountability with a friend, or even help from a professional counselor.

We have no chance of conquering depression without the help of others. There is no shame in reaching out for help when needed. I encourage you to pursue the hope found in connecting with yourself, God, and other people as you fight the battle of depression.